August 29, 2009

August 26, 2009

another update.

life is so much like roller coaster, right?

i mean, we'll never know what will we be someday, where we stand by, with whom, destiny, fate. it runs fast, faster, and suddenly everything seems so blur, we can't remember again any idea that we've planned before.
but i don't mind. i 've been learning that plan is not always be the first priority in life. somehow, we ruin it, we made mistake, we walk uneven, we forget the plan. just like now, i am writing here, no idea what must i am writing of, just type, type, and type, before they are exploding in mind and never had chance to be shouted out to the world.

oya, happy fasting for you, all Moslems.
suddenly, Ramadhan's coming, right?
It's my first Ramadhan in Jakarta, being alone again, adapting again, what a day. My first Ramadhan while working, i found it is fun, although some silly things can annoy me, and make me mad. and... just take a deep breath. i know i can made it, as four years ago when i had my first Ramadhan in Semarang, alone.

Nevertheless, i miss my mom already.

i miss Wulan too...
it's been long time since i met her for last time..
have i told you, this august is our 16th anniversary?
yipee.. we've befriended for 16 years! omigod,, it's a long time, huh?
i wish we can be that way forever, until her grandson call me "granny.." :)

another update.
i've been removed!!
hahaha.. seems my boss think it's better in many ways if i sit near him..hahahaha..
pssst, do not tell him, i don't think so, :)
however, i feel comfort in my new desk, but prefer my old one..

fellas,,,how're you doing?
tell me about your fasting, your new experience, and another bla..bla..bla..


PS. i lost my last cat.
she died because of sick.
hiks, home will never be the same again...

August 20, 2009

ternyata..

lega rasanya disaat seseorang bisa melepaskan kita dengan ikhlas.

terkadang gw merasa nggak pantas.
begitu banyak orang yang sayang sama gw, memberikan banyak sekali kasih sayang, pengorbanan, cita, harapan.
tanpa gw bisa membalas, atau memberikan sesuatu kepada mereka.
merekalah yang selama ini membentuk diri gw sehingga menjadi sekarang ini.
menjadi seorang dela yang seutuhnya.
gw harap.
sayang itu selalu ada.
walau mungkin sudah berbeda bentuknya.


dan sekarang,
biar aja kita menjalani jalannya masing-masing.
mudah-mudahan itu yang terbaik..


oke.
cerita yang lain.
i am addicted to white casablanca!!!!
kemaren perusahaan gw ulang tahun dan ada subkon yang ngirim karangan bunga gede, yang keselip beberapa tangkai bunga casablanca warna putih.
cute banget!
gw langsung kegoda buat nyabut satu, kqkqkq...



but i didn't!
keburu ketauan soalnya..
haha..




anyway...

Happy Birthday Indonesia!

Happy Birthday PP!

Jaya selalu yak!

August 18, 2009


emosional.

itulah saya.
kadang ga ngerti apa sih yang berkecamuk di dalam pikiran saya, apa saja materi-materi yang menyusun logika dan perasaan saya, sehingga saya bisa seemosional ini.
dari suatu hari yang gembira, dimana saya tertawa sampai kadang-kadang nyaris histeris, saya bisa sekejap mata merasa sedih kemudian menangis.

seringkali, empati saya berlebihan.
sehingga ketika orang lain merasa sedih, merasa marah, merasa bad mood, saya ikut terpengaruh.
saya ikut merasakan apa yang dia rasakan, mungkin bisa melebihinya.
sementara orang itu berkutat dengan masalahnya sambil menggerutu, mood saya bisa berkali-kali lipat lebih buruk daripada itu.

saya hobi menangis.
seringkali saya berpikir, apakah ada orang seperti saya yang sering sekali menangis.
Saya menangis ketika menonton film.
Saya menangis ketika mendengarkan lagu.
Saya menangis ketika menulis.
Saya menangis ketika membaca.

Seringkali saya lelah dipermainkan oleh perasaan.
Seringkali ingin mengesampingkan yang namanya emosi.


PS.
Dear mom...
life is so tiring.
being adult is never be fun.
show me the way to my childhood, so i don't have to think about life..

August 01, 2009

perfect condition

there's no such things called " perfect condition".
i've read it from evita's blog, and i realize it.

every choices have their own consequences.
i can't pleased everyone. somene maybe getting hurt, but once again there's always consequences among steps that you'll take.

all you have to do is praying, hoping that everything will be alright, do your best in every steps, and try not to repeat similar mistakes like the past.

there will always be lossess, and losses did hurt.
however, life must go on, right?
we just can't get everything we want in life.
we have to pick one.

and..
there's no such things called "right choices".
we choose, and what to make it right is what we will complete it in future,

bismillah.
i'll choose...